“Consider it a Gift From God”

Mama was fully aware of her terminal condition, but she accepted it calmly and with faith.  I would like to be able to face my last days on the earth with that kind of courage.  As things wound toward the ultimate end of her life, she had an experience that I am at a loss to explain.  Daddy and I were gone, so Murl was staying with her.  Murl said that suddenly she spoke, and he knew she wasn’t talking to him.  She said, “Go away angels.  It’s not time yet.”

Toward the last Ann and the children drove down from Cedar Rapids. On the last day of Mama’s life, Ann took care of her.  Ann noticed that certain hygiene matters had been neglected.  She asked for supplies and made the necessary corrections.  She asked the nurse if she could change Mama’s sheets.  They hadn’t been changed for several days.  Mama seemed to enjoy the cleaner environment.  She began talking to Ann about the two of us.  She said that she was glad that I had chosen Ann to be my wife, and what a blessing she had been to our family.  It was a great day for Ann.  At one point she told Ann, “I’m so tired. I wish I could go home.”   Ann said, “Mom you can go home anytime you want to.”  She said, “I think I’ll go home around sundown.”

That afternoon Daddy and Murl came to the hospital to relieve Ann.  Ann and I went back to Clyde to get supper ready for the children.  Ruby and Gary were at Daddy’s house.   Jim was in Abilene with Elliott.  Just as we were finishing supper, the phone rang.  It was Eula, Daddy’s sister.  She told me that I needed to come to the hospital immediately.  We decided Ruby and Gary would be all right by themselves for a few hours.  We knew the end had come.  As we headed the car toward Abilene, Ann said, “It’s almost sundown.”

When we arrived at the hospital room, Daddy told me what had happened.  The year was 1980.  The presidential election took place that day.  Mama never heard that Ronald Reagan was elected president.  Daddy turned on the television news at 6 o’clock, hoping to hear about returns from the east coast.  Mama asked him to turn the television set off.  He agreed.  He said, “We don’t really care who’s going to be elected president.”  He turned the television set off and mama left this world.

Dr. Calvo came a few minutes after we arrived and pronounced her dead.  Before leaving Dr. Calvo talked to me.  He said, “I have no explanation was to why she was rational these last three weeks. Consider it a gift from God.”  I did.

I asked Bob Connel to conduct the funeral.  Bob had known her for many years.  He seemed the logical choice.  Daddy said he wanted congregational singing.  I wanted the song leader to lead her favorite song, “There is a Habitation” but the song leader said he didn’t know it.  Instead, I chose “Where Could I Go but to the Lord.”  One of the verses includes the following lines.

“Living below in this old sinful world,

Hardly a comfort can afford,

Striving alone to face temptation sore,

Where could I go but to the Lord?”

The lyrics don’t fit most of us, but they did fit Mama.